Have you ever wandered around your house in the still hours before dawn, wondering where that other dryer ball went?

OK. Maybe that’s just me.

It’s the sort of thing that occurs to me when the cat has woken me with his early morning summonses in desperate need of a few minutes of cosseting and maybe a nip of a tuna treat. (OK, so he’s spoiled. Like the rest of them.) He goes back to sleep. His sister rolls and rumbles in my lap for her turn at petting and then makes her way to the center of a king-size dog bed to curl up, still purring. The dogs go out for a quick trip around the front yard and come back in to crash. Leaving me to lie awake and wonder about dryer balls.

Curiosity killed the cat owner. I get back up and wander about in the semi-dark looking for the missing one, which I find buried in a pile of clean socks waiting to be folded. Mystery solved. Disaster averted. Or at least, yet another trip to replace something I know I have and simply cannot find (add massive eye-roll here).

So, here I am, clicking away in the wee hours, finally getting back to doing what I would have done a day or two ago, but I took a little detour. Yes, the blog is posting late this week – so grateful for your patience, dear readers. It was a busy week at work, my schedule was jammed, and there were clattering events on the news. The critters (all four!) were clamoring for more of me. On top of the fur family’s desires, the clamor of news and digital distraction and social media was getting to be too much. I decided to have a little retreat with the kids. Me and the fur-fam, no clamor allowed.

First thing I did was pull back on social media. Whew. That newsfeed is a FIREHOSE. There are times when I love that – the crazy, wild, never-know-what’s-coming-next feeling. Other times … not so much. I cut my viewing to checking notifications a few times in the day and let the rush go on without me. It feels weird at first – we’re so used to the rush. But after half a day, it’s like paddling a canoe out of rapids into still, quiet water, a gliding sense of peace and relief. I also deleted a lot of incoming email without reading much. When just reading the headlines makes my head pop, I really don’t need to read the rest. I believe in being informed, but not in being constantly inflamed. The news will still be there in a day or two, or whenever I’m ready to deal with it.

Remember the CD series a few years back (OK – 20, but whose counting) called “Unplugged”? A number of terrific artists that usually play electric instruments made albums without them, letting the music get all mellow and warm. It was gorgeous. (Eric Clapton on acoustic guitar – sweet shudders!) Letting go of the digital fray meant being more present in the real, warm, real world. I could appreciate the right here, right now more – the fun of watching my two dogs play, the sweet curl of a cat possessing my lap, a cup of coffee and a good book. Ahh.  As you can tell, the kids got more sleep than I did, but we all got lots of cuddles, some lovely quiet time, a couple good long walks, and plenty of hyggeligt moments. I chose a few actions I could take that let me contribute to creating a better place without getting overwhelmed.

Have a little breather, now and again, my friends. It is good to meet the new day in peace.

---

For those of you who said “Dryer what!?” Dryer balls are little spiky rubbery balls you toss in the dryer instead of using fabric softener. They knock the static, lint , and wrinkles out of the clothes and don’t leave any chemicals behind. Wonderful little things.

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

That’s what I said, too. “Hy-what?”

I learned about it this week. It’s a Danish word and it’s actually pronounced “hoo-ga”. And you want some. I know I do.

Hygge means comfort, coziness, contentment and enjoyment in small things. It encompasses the entire Scandinavian lifestyle of being active, enjoying life, friends and family, home, the outdoors, food. By my calculations that puts it somewhere between joi de vivre and cuddling on the sofa. Count. Me. In!

It’s wonderful to come across this concept at the top of the year when the calendar has turned and I’m thinking about what I want for this new year, for moving forward, for creating the life and home I want. In the book I have (OK – so I’m an academic, if I can read about it, I will. Every time) the author gives examples from her own life and background. One thing she mentions is the habit of lighting candles, enjoying a cup of tea and a little bite,  and taking time in nature when you feel stuck on something. How delightful!

And somehow – it WORKS. If you’ve been following a while you know I’m a coffee drinker. COFFEEEE DRINKERRRRR. This engine runs on caffeine and don’t get between mama and the brew in the morning. But… on this lovely Sunday morning I was rousted out of bed at o-dark-auugh by pets far more eager to start the day than I was. I dragged myself to the kitchen, got them fed and resettled, and then, instead of heading for my usual pot of black gold, I tried a little experiment. I made a cup of chai, I lit a couple candles, and I sat down in the quiet and nibbled some grapes. It was absolutely lovely.  Continue reading →

Greetings, HaQ readers! It’s the MLK Day holiday weekend, so the blog is posting a little late this week, with one of my odd thoughts: “Set your sites on small things.”

Well – actually, you hardly hear people say that. We’re usually encouraged to aim for higher, bigger, better targets. And those are fine things to aim for. Aiming high and dreaming big can change the world – witness the amazing man today’s holiday celebrates. He did much, he inspired many, and he gave all. We still have much of his work to do.

While there are big jobs to do, there is a place in grand endeavors for smaller things. A $10 donation to a food bank allows them to distribute $100 worth of food. A pair of socks can help keep someone in need warm and dry. A fifteen minute phone call to someone you miss can light up both of your days. Nourishment, warmth, a hug. These small lovely things make a difference. Is there a small thing you want to send out into the world today?

For me, it’s a photograph.

This is a moth I found on my porch one summer morning, as big as my palm, a patient marvel. She had probably emerged overnight and been drawn to the porch light; there she was when I stepped out, soft brown, velvet-edged, blue-eyed and exquisite. She stayed for a while, then went on. When the day starts with wonder delivered to your doorstep, there’s no telling what other amazing things it will bring.

Here’s hoping there are many big and small wonders on your path. And that you get to send a few out yourself.

---

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

As in: “Where do I even start?”

Sound familiar? This thought goes through my head almost every time I start some kind of project, usually a big one, usually with no particular start or end dates, and no defined outcome… Right. So it’s not really a mystery why I don’t know where to start – I have no idea where I want to end up. Oops.

It’s the new year. There’s a lot of stuff I want to get done. Finding a way out of the “where do I” conundrum starts with being a little clearer with myself about what I really want. “Clean that room” is succinct, but vague. “Clean” encompasses a lot of action – declutter, put away, throw some things out, clean surfaces, clean the floor, maybe even washing couch covers and pillows. Faced with five or six still-considerable tasks, it’s easy to get paralyzed – which one first? But if I do that, then I need to do that other thing first… or if I do that, I need to go get (X)… (there’s always an “X” – it’s like the part of Murphy’s law no one ever told you about). Waaah!

This is one of the things my house ninjas managed beautifully – they did not tarry wondering where to start, they asked me where I wanted to end up and then they just DID. And it all got done. There’s a lesson there. One you probably don’t need to be a ninja to follow: Decide where you want to end up. And – Just start. It doesn’t matter where. Just do SOMETHING. And that something will be done. And you’ll be ready to do the next thing. Continue reading →

Greetings, dear readers, and Happy New Year!

Here we are at the top of the year, winter is gathering itself to sprinkle a little magic (I know – you may have another word for it, that is indeed four letters and starts with “s” and is not “snow” – go with me here), and it’s time to flip open a brand new calendar. I love that. There is something wonderful about opening a brand new planner, all blank, all those days with no mark upon them yet, clean and clear and, right in that moment, MINE.  Amazing.

All that time is still free, still unencumbered and full of possibilities, just waiting for fresh ideas and new opportunities and the occasional surprise. And here’s the big secret – even after the calendar starts to fill in and even when some of that stuff isn’t my favorite stuff and even after it gets too full – all that time is still MINE.

That’s worth saying again – the time in my calendar is mine, just as the days in your calendar are yours. So it falls to me to be mindful of how I fill it. I know – we sometimes use “filling time” as an expression the way you would fill a shipping box with packing peanuts. It’s just stuff to pad out the important things. Go with me for a moment.

We often refer to spending time, as it surely has an economy and we only have 24 hours to use in a day. It is valuable and in limited supply, so it makes sense to dole it out mindfully. But I like the idea of filling time, not as a way to bulk out empty space, but as you would pour something wonderful into a beautiful cup. Filling is an act of abundance and generosity. It feels lovely to think of topping up a day with special things – a sip of family time, a draught of your favorite book, a good hearty portion of work that you enjoy,  pouring a special hour of contemplation.

So here’s an invitation: When you open your lovely new planner, look at each day as a beautiful cup, made just for you. What’s worthy of your cup? What is not? What will nourish you? And what would leave you tired and thirsty for the hours back again? Changes the dynamic, doesn’t it?

Cheers, dear readers! Here’s to a fantastic new year. May your cups be filled with all you love.

---

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

Greetings HaQ fans – I hope your holidays are warm and bright. I’ve told a lot of truths over the months, a lot of them having to do with my house. So – here’s another truth: My holiday gift to myself was two sessions with a crack team of local organizers, my house ninjas. I hired two lovely ladies who blew into my kitchen and dining room with the force of a very polite hurricane and took no prisoners. None. And then they left me, after two four-hour sessions, limp and happy in the corner of the battlefield to sort out what remained.

What remained was: I kid you not, TWENTY TWO bags of trash to haul to the corner bin. I didn’t know that was even possible. I was both horrified (Oh my goodnight, that was in my house!!!) and relieved (Oh thank heavens, that’s gone!) at the tally.

So now I also have: 1. A kitchen with horizontal surfaces I can work with (floor included!) This means I have counters and tables that have seen the full light of day for the first time in … well, let’s not go there. And that my holiday baking has been a pleasure and a breeze. (Yes, I gave the ninjas treats – they surely deserved them!)

2. A dining room with open floor space, including the space in front of my pantry doors, which can now open unobstructed. And I can WALK INTO IT. Holy ninja-moly.

3. A huge box of items to donate. I had a whole host of useable items I wasn’t using – including duplicates of things I bought because I couldn’t find the one I had. I can now. (Thank you, ninjas!)

4. Several baskets and boxes of items I still needed to sort through. I sorted through three more a day or two ago and began filing things, sending things to their proper places, and for some of them that was not in my house. More relief. There are just a couple left. This is what it’s like to breathe again.

After losing all the “stuff” I gained a LOT – spaces that feel functional and clean, spaces that feel like they are reflective of how I want to BE in my home. Spaces that are easier to keep clean because the clutter isn’t blocking everything I try to do. So much nicer.

I’ve learned this is a process and it is not “done”. More stuff comes in (the postal service being a daily thing). The pets know how to make a mess or two. And – truthing still – so do I … I started the ninja process in my office all on my own by dint of a decorative, but tipsy, coffee mug that went over onto a pile of papers. Uh oh. (Luckily, most of that paper was either disposable or replaceable. Whew.)

So I gifted myself breathing room. Room to cook. Room to enjoy. Room to watch my pets play – they love their new roomier space. Room to learn some more. That is a gracious plenty.

Wishing you many gifts this holiday season – the lightness of peaceful living, space to work at what you love best, those you love to share it with. Blessings!

---

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

I get that a lot. Especially this time of year. Especially when I tell friends and family I’ll be outside much of the day, in whatever weather winter brings, often in areas where cell service is spotty, if it’s available at all. Especially when I tell them I’m counting birds and that I’ll be doing that from about 4 am until it gets too dark to see any more. It’s time for the sacred birding ritual of the annual Christmas Bird Counts.

Let me step back a moment. I am a bird-watcher. I love seeing birds, finding them, feeding them, watching their behavior, photographing them when I can. I keep a pair of binoculars next to the front and back windows of my house. I keep a compact pair in my car. Fair warning – a bird watcher is never not bird-watching. I once confused every driver around me on an Ohio two lane highway by opening my window in 30 degree weather and pointing frantically to a bald eagle flying across a farm field. I should have the bumper sticker “Will brake for eagles”. And short-eared owls (at shipping facility in eastern Kentucky). And zone-tailed hawks (at a rest-stop in south Texas). The art of bird ID at significant speed is something we pride ourselves on. That and staying in the lane.

Knowing what you’re seeing is important to a bird-watcher. At one time I had my favorite field guide sitting on the breakfast table and I read it every morning. Now I have an entire bookcase (What?! It’s a small one!) of field guides (and some are regional guides!), and several mobile apps for my phone (because – mobile! right?) When a  new field guide comes out it’s a cause for both celebration and comparison. Being a book lover, too, gathering new material is double cause for me to celebrate. Most of the guides offer something unique. I know which guides I like to use for sparrows versus seabirds, and which ones I want in the field versus at home for reference. I have a battered copy of the Golden Guide to the Birds of North America that was my first field guide and the one that contains my life list. It stays home now because I cherish the record and the memories.

For the folks who just thought “A what list?” A life list is the record of all the species you’ve ever seen. It’s fun to get a new species and put the record in your list. My new species for the year was a Townsend’s Solitaire, a lovely thrush of the Northwest. Thrushes are woodland birds related to our familiar Robin. This particular bird was a young one, and it was trying to pick bugs off my camera lens hood while I sat in the blind laughing because this very shy bird was way too close to photograph.

So on Sunday, I will be out well before dawn, hauling all my gear and a tin of freshly-baked cookies. We’ll run the ridges for owls and then spend the day  watching and listening for every bird we can find in some of my favorite places to find them. There is a network of hundreds of groups like ours who do this every year in one of the longest-running citizen science projects ever. The information is sent to coordinators at the National Audubon Society who compile it for all. I love the idea that something I do for fun can contribute to knowing more about bird populations nationwide.

What is it that makes you smile and gets you up before dawn in the freezing cold to run around all day? Go find some of that! You’ll be tired, but you’ll be happy. (And there might be cookies!)

---

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

Hello, HaQ readers! Welcome to another lovely Sunday. I woke up to a quiet house this morning and by the time I had made my coffee, the sun was just starting to lift. The sunrise lit the whole eastern horizon in pink and purple and then orange and yellow. It was gorgeous. What a gift!

It’s lovely to sit and sip and watch a beautiful sunrise lift into the morning. It’s a moment of peace, appreciated for being just what it is. A few birds popped in and out of the bird feeder. A doe wandered through the backyard. My cat came for a bit of cuddling. And I watched the sun rise. I was a being, in the moment.

And that’s why I don’t have a picture of that particular sunrise. Even though the photographer in me felt a little tug. For once I let go of the busy thoughts. I allowed myself to be in the moment, rather than trying to record the moment. I don’t need an image to remember what it felt like, and if I had rushed around to get the image, I would have only an echo of that feeling. I am happy with the choice, and those few minutes will be a positive little cushion to the day.

The holidays can be a season of bustle, but there are many opportunities to pause, for just a minute, to breathe. What moment of grace will you choose to be in today? What present moment, what gift of time will you give yourself to simply savor for what is? Perhaps it’s the touch of a loved one, perhaps the perfume of your favorite cup of tea. Perhaps a moment of joy you witness between two strangers.

Imagine all the lovely pauses out there, just waiting to be acknowledged! I hope there is one for you today.

---

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

I know… What?? Socks?

Yup. Socks. Silly ones.

OK. Now that I have you wondering what kind of Saturday night I had, let me assure you that no one gets this way from a couple hours of house TV with some dishwashing on the side. It’s all natural.

I’ve always had a thing for socks: They keep your feet warm. They can be incredibly soft and cozy. They come in every color you can imagine. And most of the time they’re mostly hidden. So you can wear completely crazy socks, that totally rock your personality – and almost no one will notice. It’s your message to yourself. You have your own secret flare, that only other people who notice socks will get. Think it doesn’t matter? I saw the personality behind the outwardly shy, rockin’-the-socks job candidate. No one else saw the socks. The socks were just a signal that there was more there than met the eye. I asked more questions. The candidate is rockin’ the job now.

I’ve always invested in a few pair of silly, fun socks. Sparkly penguins. Little romping cats. Dogs chasing leaves. It’s a smile that follows me around all day. But my favorite silly sock story is not about my socks. It’s about a pair I bought for my very ladylike, very upstanding, very proper grandmother. (Yes, I bought my grandmother silly socks.)

Gram actually didn’t wear socks very often. Being raised in an era where women rarely wore trousers, she usually wore some form of thin hosiery. But she lived in Michigan and it gets cold there! And she loved elephants. LOVED elephants. She had the most wonderful collection of elephant figurines from all over the world. She and my grandfather travelled and she always found an elephant to bring home. So when I found a pair of crazy colorful ankle socks with a large appliquéd elephant on each, I couldn’t resist. I sent them to my Grandmother for her birthday. And when my lovely, always-a-lady Gram called me to say thank you, she was laughing so hard she couldn’t speak. It was one of the sweetest, most joyful moments we had together. It still feels like a hug to remember it.

What is there that costs less than $5 or 10 that you can give some one that brings a smile, keeps them warm, and says “I love exactly who you are”? Whether it’s socks, or something else, in this season of gifting, aren’t little things like that so much fun to find? Find some for someone you love. Find some for you.

Cheers to that secret spark (and sparkle) in all of us!

---

NaNoWriMo update:  On November 30, at 11:07 pm, I hit 50,115 words. WHEW!! The last few days were a RIDE – but I got there. It reminded me that I can do more than I think I can. This 50K word collage is surely NOT a completed work; but it is done and now I have something to edit.

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!

Greetings, all. I hope the weekend has been peaceful and thankful for you. The HaQ blog is coming to you from a new home this week! You can find it at heresaquarter.com, as well as the WordPress link. I had a topic in mind for the end of November and, as happens, I’ve ditched it for something that speaking to me louder. I’ve learned to listen to that voice, so here we go.

Since this was Thanksgiving week, I was, and I’m sure many of you were, fortunate enough to spend a day or two with your family, near and far, those you are close to and those you see occasionally. It struck me, looking around, and looking at my sister-in-law’s beautiful table setting, that family is like a mixed bouquet.

Here’s why that thought came to me: In a bouquet, there are many flowers, they all have their own shapes and colors. Some will stand out and demand your attention; some will hang back and glow quietly in the background. Some appear perfect; others have bent stems or a few bruised petals, or a few spots. Some of the blooms may even look like they don’t belong, but as part of the group, they become integral to a harmonious whole. Every flower brings something and the bouquet wouldn’t be the same without them. It’s not formal, it’s not stuffy, it may be a jumble – but it’s lovely and it’s yours.

All the flowers in the bouquet play a part. Every one is different. Every one has its peculiarities. Every one has its particular way of looking out from wherever it is in the whole bunch. And none of them would be where they are without the rest to hold them up.   I am grateful for the buds next to me in the vase.

---

NaNoWriMo update: Day 27 – 35,831 words. Given that there are three days left, this puts me in “world of hurt” territory, but I’m still working on it!

Stay tuned for more on the Here’s a Quarter blog next week! As always, your thoughts and comments are always welcome – they are moderated (I know – adulting again), so they may take a little while to appear, but I read them all and appreciate that you were here. Thank you!